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Q22. (1 Kings 11:3) Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women? How does a womanizer treat a wife? How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children? Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

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  • Pastor Ralph changed the title to Q22. Excess
  • 2 months later...

Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women?

Yes. The option that he is a scheming, power-hungry man who uses women to achieve his political goals is also at play.

How does a womanizer treat a wife?

Men and women both can treat each other dishonorably when they marry each other for superficial or expedient reasons, that is, treat each other as means to an end rather than an end itself.

How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children?

The children of such a relationship know and feel their own expendability, that they were the consequence of a strategic coupling not love. Unless healed, they will forevermore carry on the behavior of regarding a spouse as a means to an end and the deep insecurities and inability to love that they subsequently acquired.

Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

Of course not. I suppose some people define "excess" differently, but it is obvious that the Christian ideal is one-man + one-woman for life wed. 

 

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I came back to add a few words. I'm surprised that the same man who wrote the Proverbs, which obviously contain verses about chastity and love, would live such opposite life. His vaunted wisdom seems to be for others, not himself. That may be harsh, but seeds of apostasy were planted by Solomon. Some say Solomon started a generational curse, as the sins of the father were passed down to his children and his children's children.

Too, I thought about how some Christians manage to push to the side or isolate what they know to be true from their daily lives. This is surprisingly easy and I'm certain all of us do this to some degree. What we know to be good/true/God's-will is not how we act. To keep our faith intact, we start creating layers of justification and obfuscation -- this is like a green, thick layer of algae on a pond that blocks the sunlight and eventually kills much of the life underneath it.

We all know people who have fallen away from faith. I know only a handful who have abandoned their faith for intellectual reasons; this is rare. Most of the time Christians backslide and then fall off the edge of faith because moral sins have smothered their spiritual life.

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I would give the benefits of doubt concerning king Salomon real love of  women . He was a lustful man and because he was blessed with much wealth, he deemed it his privilege even his right to acquire as many females that his heart lusted after. Maybe he inherited it from his father king David, lustful .
A womanizer does not have a wife as we understand it today . For him women are just a toy for a short period then being tired of it , look for a new one so on and on. 
A womanizer father has no time for offsprings . They grow up lopsided and no secure foundation on how to build a worthy life for themselves. They don’t know how to choose between what is right or wrong . 
 

It is very clear from the very beginning God created a man and a woman not women. Polygamy is not tolerated in the christian discipleship.

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Q 22. It would certainly appear that Solomon was a womaniser who lusted after women. It must have been a lonely existence, not taking time to really share his life with one wife in a meaningful way. He must have spent a lot of time thinking about woman and pursuing them, but not really giving himself time to get to know her before he was looking for the next wife. 
Each woman in his life must have felt insecure and used! The competition between all the women must have been enormous! Solomon can’t have had time to treat any of these women properly. All the time must have been spent on thinking about his next conquest. 
I don’t really know how a womaniser treats his children, but I imagine his mind is so preoccupied with women that he has little if any time for his children. He doesn’t care about their moral upbringing, and he is certainly a bad role model when it comes to teaching them how to treat women!

In Genesis 2v24 we are told”That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” God intended marriage of one man with one woman for life. As Christian’s this is what we must do, because God’s laws never change.

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Q22. (1 Kings 11:3)

Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women?

Yes

How does a womanizer treat a wife?

Solomon doesn't seek his women to be true partners. None has a good, reliable husband who loves and cares for her.

How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children?

They have no father to care for them personally and guide them to manhood.

Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

No

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Q22. (1 KINGS 11:3) 
Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women? How does a womanizer treat a wife? How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children? Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship? 
Most definitely. With all his wisdom he is unable to control his lusts. With so many wives it is impossible to have a personal relationship with any one of them. I think they are mostly treated like sex objects. In the same manner I cannot see him spending quality time with some of his children. He must have had numerous children and could not have spent a one on one with anyone of them. To me he is an absent father. Our Lord Jesus had explained that marriage is a divinely ordained union, that a man must have only one wife (Matt 19:4-6). 
 

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On 3/18/2024 at 7:37 PM, Pastor Ralph said:

Q22. (1 Kings 11:3) Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women? How does a womanizer treat a wife? How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children? Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

Yes, apparently one woman is not enough for his wants.

A womanizer does not treat a wife as she should be treated.   He is not looking out for his wife's needs, but his own.  Not true love as it should be, but a love to gratify self and his own lusts.

Having a womanizer for a father is not an good example for his children and they might grow up just like him.   They are seeking love from their father and their father's mind is somewhere else.  If his child is a girl, she might not pick a good husband but one that is just like her father and never be happy in life.

No, sexual access is not compatible with Christian discipleship because they are opposite, one seeks self, Christian discipleship seeks God!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Q22. (1 Kings 11:3) Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women?

ANSWER: It becomes clear that Solomon's drug of choice was women. So one can conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women.

How does a womanizer treat a wife?

ANSWER: A womanizer is a man who lies, charms, misleads, cheats, and disrespects his wife. He will never let his marriage get in the way of a good time. Also he has a fear of commitment. The thing with womanizers is that they don't really hate women, they love them. In fact, they love too many of them. A womanizer is someone who uses women and quickly moves on. Since they're charming and charismatic, they often have multiple “partners,” but they don't reveal their true relationship status. Therefore, they tend to mislead and manipulate women, preventing them from developing true intimate connections.

How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children?

ANSWER: We know that children who grow up a womanizer father can suffer lasting damage. If children watch fathers, brothers or uncles treat women as less than, then a percentage of those children absorb that as the norm of how to treat women. A womanizer can change. However, working on their behavior requires a lot of self-reflection, effort, and commitment.

Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

ANSWER: The primary problem with this notion of sexual chemistry is that it focuses sex on pleasure and performance.  Sex was created for man, but man was not created for sex. God gave sex as a gift to be exclusively enjoyed by a husband and wife as a means of loving, caring, serving, honoring, and enjoying each other in marriage. So sexual compatibility between a married couple comes neither from ecstasy (how good the sex is) nor frequency (how often you have it) but mainly from intimacy, which occurs as love, trust, security, and respect deepen through the longevity of a monogamous, self-giving, covenant relationship.

Great sex (which is a good, God-honoring thing) isn’t the pinnacle of humanity’s existence. True sexual compatibility, if we must call it that, happens when two people commit themselves first to God, and then to each other. This covenant commitment affords an opportunity for a husband and wife to unconditionally serve and love the way Jesus loves his bride, the church (Ephesians 5:22-33). Marriage is a journey in which two incompatible, selfish sinners learn to become one.

We must be willing to trust God and wait for sex, not because we want to have the most euphoric wedding night with someone we”re perfectly sexually compatible with, but because we want a healthy, God-honoring marriage after the wedding night with the person to whom we’ve just committed our life to.

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Q22. (1 Kings 11:3)

Is it fair to conclude that Solomon is a womanizer who lusts after women?

How does a womanizer treat a wife?

How does having a womanizer for a father affect the children?

Is sexual excess compatible with Christian discipleship?

According to the definition in the dictionary, a womanizer is a lady's man or a flirt.  He has casual affairs, no lasting relationships.  He likes to spend a lot of time in the company of women,usually in order to have a short sexual relationship with them.  

We do read that one of Solomon's downfalls was that he 'loved' many foreign women.  

With all the building that went on with Solomon as planner and putting them into place, he didn't have very much spare time.  Not only that, but also seeing to the people  who came to hear his thoughts on numerous topics, this must have taken a lot of his time.  Then also judging the people etc., I guess this was quite stressful.  So his relaxing time was then spent on women and sex, relieving himself of his stressful lifestyle.  There was never a long relationship.  Many of the wives were daughters of neighbouring 'kings' or chieftains.  These were political arrangements.  No authentic love.  In a way I think he was an extremely lonely man in spite of his busy schedule.  I think he lusted after real love and peace and unfortunately tried getting it by 'loving'  one woman after another.  

Each child is different.  So it is not really easy to say how this would affect the child.  Some children are happy with just short times with a parent and others need oodles of time with them.  Quality time is the important thing.  I don't know how such a thing would affect a child.  An absent parent is often idolized.  

Sexual excess, is also a description that is  different for each individual.  If it is **** and uncontrollable, then the answer is no, it cannot co-exist with Christian discipleship.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Yes, Solomon ended up in this state.  I wonder if any of the priests in the Temple reprimanded Solomon for these transgressions.  Pagan wives and concubines and the idol temples.  Something amiss was going on.  Disrespectful behavior towards his wife indeed.   Disregard for God's laws in regards to marriage to non Jews, and compromising the Jewish faith.   Volumes could be written on the bad decisions on King Solomon.

Womanizers cause many problems.   Solomon caused a great deal of heart aches for many people.  It's a familiar story today.   Supposedly devout Christian men and women go off the rails: leaving trails of misery for those surviving family members.  No wonder why Ezra was adamant about intermarriage of the Levites with those of pagan backgrounds.  He demanded separation,; Ezra wouldn't tolerate such things.

Sexual innuendos and excess are foreign to the HOLY BIBLE and the Christian faith.   Careful study of the Holy Bible, one would find that mortification of the flesh, daily Bible and prayer time are absolutely essential for a higher Christian life.   Time and time again, Apostle Paul wrote about the terrible consequences of sexual sins.   He was adamant how terrible these sins were; unbecoming for the Christian believer who body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit.

 

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  • 4 months later...

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