Q44. Unwholesome Talk

[Pastor Ralph]

Q44. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

[Guest Tabatha]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

( Matthew 12: 34-36 ) For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. (35) The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him. and the evil man brings evil things out of the rvil stored up in him(36 ). But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. ( 37 ) For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.

I have found many christians like to tell off-color jokes about other people, or sometimes they will make cutting remarks about some one while they are rright there, then everyone laughs. When that happens I aways feel the one doing this is trying to elevate self because of insecurities. People will also do this to them selves.

THREE GUIDELINES FROM PAUL

( 1) Is it helpful for building others up? Does it edify? Does it enlighten? Does it encourage? Not when it is in the negative sense.

( 2 ) Is it according to the hearer's needs? or only our need to vent our frustrations? Does he really need this? Does she really need this? Some things need to be said, however hard. But many of the things we say could just be left unsaid. Many things can bring wounds that take a long time to heal. We most of all need descernment in what and who we say things to words said can not be taken back. You can speak a word curse or a word blessing over someone.

(3 ) Is it beneficial to the hearer? If love is our mainstay, then benefiting others is our way of life. Insecure people need to be encouraged in what their purpose is in life. Not told how dumb or stupid they are. So many parents and teachers need to learn this lesson. Children carry the negative through out their life. some never get over the harsh things said to them.

Is it beneficial to the hearer? Not if it is a put down or judgmental or critical.

What is Slander? It is a speech that denigrates or defames, reviling, denigration, disrepect, or degrades ones chararcter.

Slander is very common among christians in the name of christianity. We can prevent it by growing in maturity and pray with the person who is doing the slandering. Also confront the person or persons that are particapating. Forgiveness goes a long ways

[Commissioned]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians?

Among Christians gossip can be considered as "unwholesome talk" since it neither edify, build up nor encourages the hearer. It comes out as a "let's pray about it" matter. But all along the subject person is seen in a belittering way.

What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say?

The guidelines that the Apostle Paul gave to measure the value of what we say are as follows:

1) Is it helpful for building others up?

2) Is it according to the hearer's needs?

3) Is it beneficial to the hearer?

What is slander?

Slander is discrediting someone for the sole purpose of lowering their status in the view of the hearer.

How common is it among Christians?

This can become very common among Christians as people put others down and don't give credit where it is due for a job well done. Also, when jealousy creep in, you find people speaking unkindly about another person with the hopes of gaining the hearer as an ally.

How can we prevent it?

We can prevent it by obeying Christ commands to "love" each other and to treat them as we ourselves want to be treated.

[cct1106]

Speaking ill of someone is unwholesome talk. Slander is speaking untruth about someone. Its sad but more devastating when it is coming from a Christian Brother or Sister. Prevent it by letting God's Holy Spirit take it away.

[Eudora]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common

among us Christians?

The most common I believe is the unwholesome talk of other denominations. The talk of another denomination judges the entire congregation and who among us can really cast that first stone. Do we not know of evil that lurks in all churches? Did we see satan work in the first church garden or did we not? We deceive ourselves when we look at anything other than Christ.

This happens to be one on my pet peeves if it were to be given a name. My anger really does get heated when I hear Christians bashing fellow folks who consider themselves Christians as well. How will they know different if we are all walking around with our noses stuck high in the air? What makes us think we are better than this one or that one? In truth, this is pride in religion and self flattering pride. It is ugly and must stop. Jesus will sit on His throne until we all submit to His will and not our own. He can not rule a kingdom if we are not kingdom people who think kingdom thoughts and speak kingdom likeness and bare His image of love in all unity. I remember a meeting of the women

[Ken7]

WE put down weaker believers. We become angry with those we disagree with.

1) Is it helpful for building others up?

2) Is it according to the hearer's needs?

3) Is it beneficial to the hearer?

We slander with gossip.

[PCHRIS]

The tearing down of people behind their backs and sometimes in front of their faces. We are taught in the Scriptures of how to handle conflict within the church body but for some its easier to go off and 'bag' other people than to come together and reconcile things together.

These arePaul's guidelines-

Is it helpful for building others up? Does it edify? Does it enlighten? Does it encourage?

Is it according to the hearer's needs? Or only our need to vent our frustrations? Does he really need this? Does she really need this? Some things need to be said, however hard. But many of the things we say could just as well be left unsaid.

Is it beneficial to the hearer? If love is our mainstay, then benefiting others is our way of life.

Slander is malicious gossip.

It is common amongst Christians, the thing that gripes me is when you confront people about it they give the cliche, "Oh, I am only human" and thats when I usually point them to this Scripture, Ephesians 4:22-25.

Praying through these Scriptures, taking off the old and putting on the new, DAILY.

[JustJeff]

From what I see, and have been guilty of myself, slander is at the top of the list for unwholesome talk amongst us. Rather than trusting in the Lord to deal with those whom we might not agree with, or like for that matter, we seem to think that talking about the person behind their back will make things better. That just causes more problems.

Paul tells us in verse 29 to mark our words, speak words to encourage and build the body up which means that we should talk directly to the person whom we might disagree with in a loving way rather than behind their back. The result should be positive for both parties. That will stop slander dead in it's divisive tracks.

[masika]

Most of the wholesome talk that come out of Christians are foul or abusive languages. We tend to look down upon non-believers , we are forgettng that we are saved by the grace of God and not according to our good deed. There is nothing good we can do to earn our salvation it is only by God's Grace.

Three guidelines Paul gives are - Everything we say should be - Good,

-Helpful, and

-Encouraging those who hear them.

Slander- Is the utterance of false charges or misrepresentation which defame and damage another reputation OR

-False and defamatory oral statement about a person.

Slander is most common among Christians and the only thing to get rid of it is by the help of the Holy Spirit to dwell in us and guide us in our talk.

[BJB123]

"Unwholesome talk" to me means gossip, talk with a loose tongue, speaking unkind things about others, hurtful thing, etc.

Three Guidelines:

1.Is it helpful in building others up?

2.Is it according to the hearer's needs?

3.Is it beneficial to the hearer?

If you cannot say something good, then, DON'T say anything at all. That's my philosophy.

Slander is cutting others down, saying unkind things to the face or to the back of others. Slanderous words are killing words, hurtful words.

I believe that slander is very common among Christians. It should not be because Christians should not speak slanderous to or about anyone Christian or not. Sometimes in Business meetings, people will get angry and say things that are very hurtful and slanderous which causes the unity and body of Christ to be divided. Slander and gossip to me is the biggest cause of the lack of unity in churches today. People can prevent slander by practicing self discipline. People who have this type problem should be on their knees before the Lord and repent.

[June]

By being critical of another. Saying something bad or evil.

(1) Is it helpful for building up another.

(2) Is it according to the hearer's needs.

(3) Is it beneficial to the hearer.

Slander is anything that puts another down with disrespect.

Always say things that makes another feel good, builds them up and not repeat anything that is not of wholesome nature.

[kiqstart]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

Sometimes they gossip, but they think they are not because they are justifying what they are saying.

[Lisa Rupert]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians?

Let's see "unwholesome talk" when we speak about others without lifting them up. We do it to gain our own fair. When we don't fully understand and disagree we speak against it. When we gossip about someone or something without regards to the situation we speak unwholesomely about it. Not showing our best, not living a Christ-like life. Believing that we are divine and only we have a special place in God's Kingdom, the unclean have not a chance. Forgetting the type of person we once were before we "Put on our new self". Not demonstrating love and compassion the way God provides love and compassion for us.

What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say?

Is it helpful for building others up? Does it edify? Does it enlighten? Does it encourage? Is it according to the hearer's needs? Or only our need to vent our frustrations? Does he really need this? Does she really need this? Some things need to be said, however hard. But many of the things we say could just as well be left unsaid. Is it beneficial to the hearer? If love is our mainstay, then benefiting others is our way of life

What is slander?

Slander (blasphēmia) is "speech that denigrates or defames, reviling, denigration, disrespect, slander."15

How common is it among Christians?

We Christians get into the earthly unclean beings of ourselves and we forget that we are examples of Christ.

How can we prevent it?

I remember a man once told me that his father taught him "Never leave a man the sameway you found him, always lift him up". I try to follow this analogy when engaging with all of God's creation.

[charisbarak]

Gossip is common among Christians. Putting down others, or their ministries, to make yourself and your ministry look better is another common way for Christians.

This is great--if we (yes, me) would think about this before opening our mouths:

Is it helpful to building up others?

Does the hearer need to hear it?

Is it beneficial to the hearer?

I would add: Is it true? Would I mind if the person I was talking about found out I told this other person? Oh, to think FIRST.

Slander is common among Christians. We sometimes don't care for a certain person--but we can love them as Jesus told us to. It may not be the slander someone would take you to court over, but if it hurts another person--it is bad enough. It should hurt us to realize that we have done this, against God.

How can we prevent slander? I think this saying I grew up with says it "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!" I think realizing how much of a sinner we are ourselves, we have no room to say anything unkind about anyone else!!

[haar]

The common unwholesome talk among Christians include such talk that is not healthy; dirty language, abusive and immoral language etc.

The three guidelines are:

1. We have to speak only what will build one another

2. What we speak must be only that which is for the need of the hearer.

3. It has to be beneficial to the hearer.

Slander is any unwholesome talk about some one that is meant to degrade, demean and lower him before others. This is very common with Christians unfrotunatelly, as we find ourselves taking at the back of others.

We can prevent this only by submitting our selves to the leading of the Holy Spirit who will control our behaviour as we can NOT be Christ-like in our our own ability or power.

[Helen Williams]

We say things that can make others look small in the listener eyes. If it will hurt, tear down and not build up, we should not speak it. The three guidelines that Paul gives us to measure the value of what we say are: (1). Is it helpful for building others up? Most of the time we are concern about making ourelves look good. (2) Is it according to the hearer's need? Somethings should not be said, maybe the timing might be off. Is this really what the hearer need at the moment? (3) Is it beneficial to the hearer? Some words spoken are not helpful but can do more harm. Always speak in love.

What is slander?

Slander is when we make other look small in the eyes of the hearer. When this happen we are trying to make self look important and bigger. This can be very common among christian. Remember when the desciples was wondering which one would be the greatest in the kingdom. The greatest is the least, we are all servant.

We can avoid this by letting the Holy Spirit guide us. We should taste our own words before we speak them. If they taste bitter to us, we know they will taste bitter and not sweet to the hearer.

We have to stop being selfish and start thinking of our fellowman in love.

[Stan]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

The most that I feel hurt the church is the way that we some time are drawn to talk about other people behind their back, not know the problems they could be facing, belittleing them and not showing the christian love that Jesus said we should.

Is it helpful for building others up? Does it edify? Does it enlighten? Does it encourage?

Is it according to the hearer's needs? Or only our need to vent our frustrations? Does he really need this? Does she really need this? Some things need to be said, however hard. But many of the things we say could just as well be left unsaid.

Is it beneficial to the hearer? If love is our mainstay, then benefiting others is our way of life.

Slander is telling something hurtful about some one that is not true and knowing that it is not true when we tell it.

I pray that it is not to common but I guess that it is more common than should be. We can prevent it by never being drawn into talking about others. We need to pray for those who we know are and ask for strength in never falling into the need to ourselves. We need to study and seek out other christians that don't feel the need to talk about other people and their problems.

[linda bass]

The biggest kind of "unwholesome talk" I can think of that occurs among Christians is gossip.

Christians talk about others behind their backs and call it concern for their souls.

Or someone will bring up a "juicy bit" of gossip about a person and disguise it as a prayer request.

The three guidelines Paul gave us to measure the value of what we say are

1) Does what we say build others up? Does it edify, enlighten, or encourage them?

2) Is it according to the hearer's needs? Does he or she really need to hear what we have to say?

3) Is it beneficial to the hearer.

Slander is putting down someone by malicious gossip in order to make the slander feel better about themselves.

Unfortunately, this is quite common among Christians.

We can prevent slander by refusing to listen to it, by walking away when we hear someone start to be slandered.

If we have been guilty of slander, we need to confess it to God as sin and repent of it.

[sis. dee]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

Gossip is the biggest unwholesome talk that is very common among us Christians.

1) Does what we say build others up? Does it edify, enlighten, or encourage them? 2) Is it according to the hearer's needs? Does he or she really need to hear what we have to say? 3) Is it beneficial to the hearer.

Slander is putting down someone, bad talking them.

This is very common among Christians.

How can we prevent it? I believe by praying and ask the Holy Spirit to guide our mouth.

[Minchar]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

I believe that gossip is unwholesome tale that is common among Christians. Paul gives us three guidelines to use to judge or measure the value of what we say. First, is this conversation edifying or building up this person or the body of Christ. Second, is this conversation bringing unity or division. Our we just using this conversation to vent out our frustration. Thirdly, does this benefit the hearer? Slander is defaming a person, causing others to look down on someone because of something negative we said about that person. Slander is very common among Christians. We call it venting our frustration about someone when we are really slandering that person. We can prevent slander by using those three guidelines Paul gives us.

[sahala p.s.]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

The kind of

[Jewell]

Unwholesome talk would be anything that deters from the 3 guidelines that Paul gives us. Pauls guidelines are: it builds up others, it needs to be heard, or it is beneficial.

Slander is anything negative said about another person and is usually grounded in heresay. It is common among Christian and non-Christian. We can prevent is by (1) not going there (2) not accepting it from others - letting them know that you don't want to hear it (one of those negative things that needs to be heard).

[AngelOnLine]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians?

Gossip and slander.

What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say?

1. Is it helpful for building others up?

2. Is it according to the hearer

[meandean]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

you name it, we know we have said it. you know, proverbs tells us that even a foolish man is thought to be wise if he keeps his mouth shut. we are really good at breaking things and we really find ourselves struggling when we try to build any kind of relationship. from flattery to jokes, we have a way to tear things down.we should use our words wisely by sharing good things and building up and strengthening one another, and by ministering grace by helping each other as we live out this life here. slander is good for one thing and that is the grave. let it rot there.the only way to prevent it is the holy spirit. noone can hold his tongue. it must be turned over to the holy spirit.

[meandean]

Q3. (Ephesians 4:29-32) What kind of "unwholesome talk" is common among us Christians? What three guidelines does Paul give us to measure the value of what we say? What is slander? How common is it among Christians? How can we prevent it?

you name it, we know we have said it. you know, proverbs tells us that even a foolish man is thought to be wise if he keeps his mouth shut. we are really good at breaking things and we really find ourselves struggling when we try to build any kind of relationship. from flattery to jokes, we have a way to tear things down.we should use our words wisely by sharing good things and building up and strengthening one another, and by ministering grace by helping each other as we live out this life here. slander is good for one thing and that is the grave. let it rot there.the only way to prevent it is the holy spirit. noone can hold his tongue. it must be turned over to the holy spirit.