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Q6. Healing the Wounds of Divorce


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I believe when a marriage is in trouble the couple need to seek guidance from the church.  Counseling both and prayer.  Talking over what the conflicts in the marriage are and trying to compromise.  There are times when differences are just to much to overcome.  In my case I did not believe in divorce I felt it was a sin.  I ask God for forgiveness.  I was very careful when I remarried.  I was sure and explained my past and my apprehension to him about marriage and divorce.  We had the same goals and we both walk a Christian path.  I chose wisely.  26 years.  But, God heard me cry and forgave me.

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  • 1 year later...

Praying with a person about their struggling marriage is a way to extend Christ's healing, not judgment.  Listening to them, loving them and pointing them to God and His Word are ways to encourage them.  Offer to check a few local churches or ministries to see if sound marital counseling is offered if they have not found anything on their own yet.  It is the same for someone who has been divorced.  Pray with them that God will bring either reconciliation or a release to move forward in God's plan for their life.

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Q6. The Church has always been supportive of those who are hurting or scarred. In Christ, we help people make the best of what is sometimes a difficult situation. What can you do to extend Christ's healing love to someone who is struggling in his or her marriage? What can you do to bring healing to someone who is or was divorced? 

 

To someone who is struggling in their marriage, I can encourage them with prayer and open ears with an objective understanding according to the Bible.  Love and support with prayer can bring healing to someone who is or was divorced.

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What can you do to extend Christ's healing love to someone who is struggling in his or her marriage? In marriage when there is offense and conflict, we identify our spouse as the enemy. Our spouse is rarely the enemy. If we learn who our enemies really are, we can effectively fight the battles in our marriages and be renewed. Our real enemies are the powers of darkness and our own flesh. These enemies often go unnoticed in conflict. Satan intends for all marriages to be destroyed. If you commit to God and your mate, you can defeat the evil forces who are waging this strife. Take the “you” out of the equation, God is a formidable ally, together you cannot lose. Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

 

What can you do to bring healing to someone who is or was divorced? When it hurts so bad that getting up in the morning is difficult then a little intervention is needed. Take one day at a time and realize that this hurt will not last forever. Going to work helps, get back to living. Distractions can be good if they are positive. Concentrate on what is important and try to forget the negative aspects of the past. Set new goals and work towards accomplishing them. Accept that life is going to be different but different can be good. Work to make life better. If there are children involved then concentrate on making life better for them. Get up in the morning and go to work for the children. They need you to be healed, so do what it takes for that to happen and experience healing God can provide. Psalm 34:18 The LORD is near unto them that are of a broken heart; and saves such as be of a contrite spirit.”

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The only thing that I think I can do when someone is struggling in his or her marriage is just to sit and listen to them. Then I could pray with them. I don’t know if there is anything that I could say to them because it is a personal matter that they are dealing with.

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  • 2 years later...
On 12/19/2007 at 10:25 PM, Pastor Ralph said:

Q6. The Church has always been supportive of those who are hurting or scarred. In Christ, we help people make the best of what is sometimes a difficult situation. What can you do to extend Christ's healing love to someone who is struggling in his or her marriage? What can you do to bring healing to someone who is or was divorced?

First to Love unconditionally

To speak less and listen more.

To pray with them, prayer is powerful.

To always be there for them.

If need be,  suggest Christian Counseling.

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  • 2 years later...
On 12/19/2007 at 10:25 PM, Pastor Ralph said:

Q6. The Church has always been supportive of those who are hurting or scarred. In Christ, we help people make the best of what is sometimes a difficult situation. What can you do to extend Christ's healing love to someone who is struggling in his or her marriage? I have a friend, a devout Christian, who has been married over 20 years, with 9 children who has been abused for most of those 20 years. She has often sought me out as a refuge, in the event she decides to end her marriage. I don't know how to heal the hurt that she suffered in those years but I have always made myself available to her, in the event that she suddenly needs a place to rest her head. If powers that be allow me to get a well paying job, I would just buy her a house near me so I could protect her.

What can you do to bring healing to someone who is or was divorced? This is only if we assume that the divorce was hostile. In our society, sometimes couples that divorce are elated to be away from each other as evidenced by some articles in the Weddings pages of The NY Times. Divorce is not always bad and sometimes it's the best remedy for a couple who make sparring a daily activity. I would just say if you're a divorcee with less than your spouse, get enough in the settlement so as not to have to struggle to feed yourself and your children. And then move on to what else God has lined up for you. Divorce is not the end of the world so then make it one for yourself.  

 

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  • 3 months later...

The best is to be there for them and do not judge them or the other party.

Pray together.

When the person is ready, work through what Scripture says about the topic.

Repentance brings healing and also enables one to forgive and lay aside.

With this topic as with every other, allow God to do the revealing. 

Be available to hold up the hurting and to love uncondisionally

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  • 3 years later...

Q6. The Church has always been supportive of those who are hurting or scarred. In Christ, we help people make the best of what is sometimes a difficult situation. What can you do to extend Christ's healing love to someone who is struggling in his or her marriage? What can you do to bring healing to someone who is or was divorced?  Each marriage, each divorce, each situation is different.  Sometimes I listen.  Sometimes I encourage counseling. Sometimes I am not a happy camper over the situation--I disagree with the choice.  ALWAYS I pray.  I pray and thank God that He is the JUDGE, not me. I pray to see with His eyes and pray with the person when they permit me to do that. SO many need healing from rugged, raw, situations or the choices they have made. Always when I pray for them, I pray they choose to seek His wonderful, incredible, amazing, LOVING, will for their life.

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